by Ethan Johnson
April 26, 2007

Here we are now, entertain us:

Idiocracy: I was under the impression that this was a "straight to video" release. For as little effort as Fox put into promoting it, it might as well have been. The movie was reasonably interesting and entertaining, however my chief concern is that the story comes off like it was planned on a cocktail napkin. It feels like Mike Judge had a rough idea for a movie, and suddenly was tasked with filming the thing. As a result, it's pretty uneven, but worth watching if for nothing other than the first 5 minutes.

Babel: Ugh. If anyone sees Jesus Christ, let him know I'd like this 2 hours and 15 minutes back. Hint: Long-ass movies with subtitles and "worldly" locales do not automatically equate as "important" and "poignant". Instead, casting-wise it was more like "welfare", as half of the acting public is covered with insurance for another 12 months. The story itself is a mess. Strongly unrecommended. Or join us in our vigil as we await the return of our lost time. (Added later, but before press time: The more I stew on this movie the more annoyed I get. Briefly, I have what I like to call "international agoraphobia" (fear of leaving one's home country). Movies like this don't reduce/eliminate it. Grrr. And upon reflection, the movie was profoundly pointless. Ugh.)

An Inconvenient Truth: I found myself repeatedly thinking "Al Gore for President" as I watched this. The marketing of this movie versus the actual content are worlds apart. I wasn't expecting the autobiographical narrative pieces in-between sections of Gore's now-famous "slide show." If Living History was supposedly the smoking gun that foretold of Hillary Clinton's run for President in 2008, then I posit that ...Truth is Al Gore's. Kinda makes you wonder where all this was back in 1999/2000, but perhaps he packs more punch now after 6+ years of "not exactly." I'm told that the movie does contain minor errors, by fairly reputable sources. I'm interested to know what they were, but I highly recommend seeing this, and better yet, actually doing something about global climate change.

Tightrope: This is going to sound silly, but if I had to use a single word to describe this movie, it's "dated." This doesn't mean that all prior movies earn this distinction. But it's very much a product of its time (1984), which in some ways was good for the nostalgic moments. But some of the attempts at "grit" come off like Motley Crue and Def Leppard these days: "Hard rock" back then; laughably silly today. Overall this was a pretty flat thriller. Other movies tell the same story worlds better. But if nothing else, Clint Eastwood showed sparks of complexity that would color his later works. Rent it if the spirit moves you.

Full Metal Jacket: I have been avoiding this movie since its release, and finally made the time to sit through it. I'm firmly planted in the Apocalypse Now camp, which removes any urge to watch other would-be "edgy" Viet Nam dramas. This movie was of course, completely different from end to end. The first half was compelling, but the second half kinda fell flat for me. But for those of you who see it, yes, that's "Dr. Christian Shepard" in the role as the head journalist or whatever. He's much younger and barely recognizable relative to his more iconic role on Lost. Rent if you're into Kubrick films and/or war dramas.

The Hidden Fortress: For as much of a Star Wars (1977) nut as I am, ya'd think I'd have seen this movie much earlier in life. I finally made the time to sit through it, and after all of the buildup, I'd say that Star Wars was very loosely derivative without being a carbon copy. Perhaps it was meant to be in the early going, but in the end they are two very different movies. It was an interesting flick, and taken on its own merits it had amusing moments but it was kinda dry. There are cross-cultural disconnects in play, unfortunately, but in short I'd say it's worth the rental if you're into Akira Kurosawa films, or Japanese dramas in general. If you're not sure that you'd like that sort of thing, skip it.

Casino Royale (2006): Previously on 24 Bond Movies... Apparently the producers of the James Bond franchise got the memo: More Jack Bauer, less Roger Moore. I didn't know diddly about Daniel Craig going into this movie, but I think he delivered a solid anti-Bond. Seriously, this iteration of the venerable series tosses out just about everything relating to the tried and true Bond formula, and comes out swinging for a solid 90 minutes. Then we get to the final half hour, where apparently the writer(s) or director won a Bahamas getaway, because the pacing gets really strange during that otherwise critical time. On the whole, it's a great movie and highly recommended, Bond fan or no, but just be prepared for a jarring change of pacing when you'd least expect it. Enjoy.

Leaving Las Vegas: That was the movie that was. Here's the scoop: Despite my Nicolas Cage fatigue, this movie turned up in IFC's rotation and I decided to get it over with, due to the positive reviews it received, such as from Marlena. The first 15 minutes took days (!) to get through. I just wasn't in the mood for absolute and utter hopelessness. I finally steeled my resolve and the movie more or less lightened up, or at least became more watchable after that initial 15 minute death spiral. What annoys me to no end is that Nicolas Cage clearly can act. But he does a string of dumb action movies, or dumb movies period, and just when I write him off completely he does a film like this or Adaptation and my faith is renewed. If only Cuba Gooding Jr. could be so lucky. This is not the kind of movie you "just" pop in and enjoy, so rent with reservations, if at all. Solid performances though, which tips the scales to the "rent it" side.

Once In a Lifetime: I probably should have watched this after Leaving Las Vegas, but I was in the zone and saw it before. What an amazing movie. In a nutshell, it chronicles the rise and fall of the New York Cosmos, a 1970s US pro soccer team that managed to coax Pelé out of retirement. The story is so zany and unintentionally hilarious that I'm counting the minutes until the Jim Carrey (or whoever) version comes out in a more fictionalized form. Maybe Cuba Gooding Jr. as Pelé? If you don't give a rip about soccer, you're probably glossing over this review anyway. But seriously folks, this movie transcends "just" soccer and has so much more to offer. If it weren't clearly a true story, you'd swear it was a mockumentary. Highly recommended (duh), but may not appeal to people who don't like anything sports-themed. Give it a whirl. <EM>